The Life of a Varsity Girls Basketball Intern: Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, BUT, some Women are from Mars, Part I

Lessons Learned

This is the first experience I have ever had coaching girls in any sport. While I have some prior experience mentoring guys in basketball, coaching girls is a completely different story...and, trust me, I knew this coming in. However, putting theory into practice is a not always easy.

I once learned in English to know your audience. This principle definitely applies to Varsity Girls basketball. Therefore, when I try to coach the girls dealing with technique or fundamentals, I have utilized, or at least tried to utilize, different tactics that I probably would with guys. Listed below are some examples:

Scenario 1: During a game, a player comes down the court and misses a wide open lay-up...

Coaching a Guy: (Foot Stomp!) What the crap was that? You can't just run 90 mph at the goal and expect the ball to go in. Missed lay-ups can lose ball games!

Coaching a Girl: (Clapping) That's ok, your form looked great on that ... lay-up. I "know" you'll make it next time, get back and play good defense.

From this scenario, we can clearly conclude that often guys and girls respond to different stimuli. Guys often respond to criticism, which can even be negative at times, because in the South, criticism "threatens their manhood" and they want to prove the criticizer wrong.

I have found that girls generally respond well to positive reinforcement. Most girls seem more secure in their abilities and aren't out to prove something to everyone in the world. However, if someone, such as a coach, negatively points out a flaw, it generally does not go over well and causes a reverse response from guys. Sometimes girls can then become too concerned about that one flaw, completely focusing on it, and blocking out the rest of the game. In contrast, if a coach positively reinforces a mistake, most girls respond well because there is less pressure on the mistake, allowing them to not focus on the mistake, but the game.

(Don't make comments to girls that reference size)

Scenario 2: I am working with forwards/centers with post moves around the goal...

Coaching a Guy: Listen, Offensive Player X, you are much bigger than Defensive Player Y, use your size as an advantage to score. If Defensive Player Y is right on you, put your butt into him and back him down!

Coaching a Girl: Listen, Offensive Player X, you are much bigger than Defensive Player Y, use your size as an advantage to score. If Defensive Player Y is right on you, put your butt into her and back her down!

Ha, ha, ha...yikes. Notice, there is no difference in the way in which I handled coaching a guy and a girl. This scenario actually happened, unfortunately.

If you are guy and haven't already noticed the problem, let me lay it out for you.

Problem #1: Girls do not appreciate comments about their size. While as a coach I was thinking nothing negative when I told one of the girls that she was bigger than the other and to use her size as an advantage, she probably did not share the same feelings as me. She probably felt obese after that comment. Fail.

Should've Said: You have more height than the other girl, use your height as an advantage!

Problem #2: I told one of the girls to put her butt into the other player. While it is hard to describe to a girl to "body up" to the player behind them and play more physical without saying "put your butt into her," coming from a 24 year old college student to a 12-14 year girl sounds a little Uncle Trickett-ish. Fail.

Should've Said: Play more physical, backing the defender down!

(One may expect a "butt" comment from Uncle Trickett, but not me!)